Writing the Wisdom of Your Soul – The Fool

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[This post is part of my October writing challenge where we’re mixing writing with tarot to unlock our the wisdom of our souls]

The Fool

IMG_20141002_192314Where am I going?

It’s a question I ask myself with absurd frequency.

I never come up with a destination. I have hazy pictures in my mind of somewhere I wouldn’t mind seeing or something that I might possibly, maybe want to do or experience.

I move forward, without a map. I fear stagnation but I’m beginning to see that my forward motion is really busy-ness, a spinning in the same spot frenzy with the occasional baby-step forward.

I frustrate myself with the inability to see long term or even mid term.

I feel there’s something wrong with me. That I don’t want things badly enough.  That I don’t have enough passion.

And then there’s the part of me that I don’t want to acknowledge.  That perhaps I like being stuck. That spinning in my busy-ness keeps me safe while simultaneously satisfying my ego that I’m doing everything I can.

Worst still, that on a deeper level, I’m not worthy of having a life that I’m madly in love with.  Perhaps the spinning induced vertigo makes my ears ring so I can’t hear the thumpty-thump of my heart.

I don’t have a five-year plan or even a one-year plan.   What I have is an ability to do things.  I can tick off my to-do list like a speed demon but planning out where my soul wants to take me? I freeze.

Occasionally, my soul whispers things to me and makes me listen.  My soul shoves me out of my spinning and I make things happen.  They happen fast.  I need to do things. I don’t give myself the time to panic, plan or procrastinate.

I move.

I do.

I am the Fool.

I feel myself catapulted further along my soul path, one step closer to what I’m meant to be doing.  Really meant to be doing. Not just filling time with busy-ness.

And I say to myself:  I’m really going somewhere now.

And I am.

I just don’t know where.

More about Lyn

I’m an author, writer, life coach, EFT tapper and an inner goddess unleasher! I'm the creator of the Sea Whispers oracle and founder of the Inner Goddess Circle. I believe in magic and sparkles and the amazing possibilities of you.

2 thoughts on “Writing the Wisdom of Your Soul – The Fool

  1. Linda Ursin

    I have a lot of the same things going on. Although I know I am worthy, and you definitely are too.

    Reply

  2. Michelle

    So much of this rings absolutely true with me, too. I glimpse where I think I want to be but it’s far more like a feeling than images. For now, I’ll just keep putting one word in front of the other.

    For now…

    Reply

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